haha

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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