Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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Well, you see, I'm an extractor fan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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Jacob licked out his buthole again. It was becoming a usual thing for him to do, it suddenly became one of his hobbies and wanted to lick more, so he started licking MR. Macs

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

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A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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Pop Fiction last words. guess who edition: "Okay okay you win again Batman! Ahahaha hohohoho hehehehe! Wanna hear a new jo... Eh... what are you doing with that gun?" "Why did I not just take a step or two to the side during the five hours and over thirty episodes he kept charging that Kamehameha?" "Bah I cannot die as long as my ego is full! Are these really the ratings on my latest game? H0moerotic? Childish? A sociopath? Oh man..." Moral: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the moralmanBitch! HOAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

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Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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I love you

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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