What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

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What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

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Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I shit my pants do you want my poo.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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