How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

What's white and black? Color blind.

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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