How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What is similar between a dog and a cat? They are both dogs except for the cat.

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Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

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Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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i like turtles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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