whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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A man name Bill works 12 hours a day at a warehouse, almost everyday a week. It is a hard job but Bill does it to support his beautiful wife of many years. Bill thinks the long hard days are worth every moment he gets to spend with her. One night, after a hard day, he comes home to find another man in bed with his wife. Bill begins to sob and yell "I work 12 hours a day at a warehouse....." His wife yells back. "We already read this part, get to the punchline".

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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John is at the movies, when he drops his cookie on the floor. A passer-bier accidentally steps on it as he's about to pick it up. "Sorry" says his man. "I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles" said Terry. The man then proceeds to murder Terry.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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i threw my line in the toilet the fishing was pretty shity that day

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

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Michael Brown

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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