roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

thumb_up thumb_down +8

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

there once was a black man who played basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +6

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops