What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

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once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

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What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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