Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

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A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

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Why do gingers smell so bad? So the blind can hate them too

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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