Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

A fat African a rich mexican and a gay guy jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The gay guy because fat Africans and rich Mexicans don't exist

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

What's the difference between a 1980 mustang and a pile of dead babies? I don't have the mustang in my garage.

What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

When life gives you lemons, make beef stew.

What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

I have cancer. And you're next.

wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

how many pancakes does it take to build a dog house? none boats don't have wheels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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