What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

Apple hates Blackberry.

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

A man walks into a bar. He's just entered into the Twilight Zone.

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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