HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

2 people lived next door to each other. The man said "hi" and so did the other man. What is wrong with this situation. Nothing, just friendly neighbors.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

thumb_up thumb_down -23

mmm i love marble bumhole

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops