How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

Fat? Jesse Z

If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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