so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's 9 + 10 19 AB

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops