What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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