You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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What do you call a cow with no legs A cow with no legs.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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have safe sex

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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What did the duck with one leg say to the pirate? Woof.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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Racist Math Ahmed is on a train from D.C to New York the train is traveling at 125 mph. the distance between New York and D.C is 250 miles. How many will die in the blast.

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

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numbers just make the funniest antijokes

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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