Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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69

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops