Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

Mogok Papiti.

What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

A horse walks into a bar, the barman says why the long face, the horse says, my dad died this morning.

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

A blind man walks into a library.

the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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