What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

thumb_up thumb_down +9

two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +9

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops