Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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hi

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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A:why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side =D B:...i dont think you fully grasp the concept of an anti joke yet...smh -.-

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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