Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion...

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

like if your cool

Q: What is black, white and red all over? A: Interracial sex during the time which the bible has decreed as abhoration.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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