Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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