So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

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HA HA HA HA HAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHYHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA - Bomber

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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Whats long and red all over? This Cut on my arm, i should get it checked out.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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