Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

a black man pays his child support

Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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