Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

Knock Know Who's there? Not your dog, he just got run over.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Shoot him in the face.

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. YO YO YO I F U C K YOU ALL!

why couldn't the bicycle stand up on it's own? because it was two tired

this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

Roses are red, violets are blue, grass is green, sky is blue, dirt is brown, fire is orange, water is transparent, powder is white

Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

Knock knock Who's there? Brittney Spears Brittney Spears who? Knock Knock Who's there? Opps I did it again.

Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

A moose walks into a store and asks the lady where the potatoes are. She says "isle five". he walks to isle five and there were no potatoes

A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...