My jeans

What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

My mom

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

if got a joke if fogot it

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

Turkey Balls

A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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