Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Why doesn't Batman exist? Because he was made up.

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Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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Lololol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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