why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

Granny porn!

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...