How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

I was watching Fox news.

Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

Q What did the Whale say to the Giraffe? A Why are you in the ocean?

a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

There's a black guy in a house. What's he doing there? He owns it.

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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