why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

Your a christain on a lovely vacation with your family a querr waalks by. What do you do? you push the queer of the edge.

A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

Knock knock It's open, come in

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

Fat? Jesse Z

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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