How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

What's the difference between a duck?

I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

What's red and can sing? Elmo

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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