Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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Equal rights!

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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Whats long and red all over? This Cut on my arm, i should get it checked out.

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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