What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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mmm i love marble bumhole

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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