Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

A penis walks into a bar..

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

Bala: Brid why don't you drink? Brid: When I was in college I was in students council. Whenever my friends called me during night, I used to go pick them up. Once we were working late in college and in the morning my hair was all ruined...

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

Whats black and white and red all over? A dead zebra

Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

Columbus Day... A day to remember the anniversary of Columbus enslaving America.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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