A: Knock Knock.. B: Who's there? A: John B: John Who? A: Shut the hell up, i'm masturbating.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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What do you call a dead black man? A corpse.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

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hy did the boy cross the road? to jump of the bridge on the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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