Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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