Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops