Why is Tommy dead? Because he died.

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

Ben Corbishley

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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