A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a dyslexic man walked his god.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops