A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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What's funnier than 24? 9/11

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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