- Anti Joke

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

Man U

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.