Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

sky silverstein

A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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