Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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knock knock? come in

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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