whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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