Dead girls can't say no.

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How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Ok so, we have bread , tofu, coolwhip

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dyslexic's Untie

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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Micheal jackson had half a pie, Fred had the other half of the pie, They both shared a pie.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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What's big and black? An ant i lied about in being big

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why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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What's dirtier than an ice cream cone rolled in dirt? The dirt it was rolled in.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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