Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

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why is there art classes so people can make beautiful pieces of art :)

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

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Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

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HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

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What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

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Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

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What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

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Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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