Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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stinky boner

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

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y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops