There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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Why did the teacher give out homework? she is a teacher

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What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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If you have me you want to share me, if you share me you no longer have me. What am I? (a secrect)

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What is better than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to 10 Trees.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

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Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

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Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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What comes after Friday? A ?.

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

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What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" Unable to understand English, the horse shits on the floor and leaves.

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops