What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

Roses are red, yup.

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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