Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

What did the guy say to the mushroom?

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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